16 January 2008

Doggie Destroyer!

Today after work, me and muzzer went to our local Pet s Mart store.

We wanted to use the gift card that g-papa got me for my holiday gift. We had a great time walking up and down the aisles. We (OK, I ) sniffed a lot of toys and lots of different foods and treats.

We picked up some new treats that taste like Peanut Butter and say they are "Gooberlicious" I wrote Stanley when we got home to make sure he knows they are using the name of his country, so he can collect royalties.

We got a big bag of my favorite kibble, which is made from venison and brown rice. I got a new kind of shampoo that is s'posed to make me look whiter and brighter! I got treats from two of the people who helped us in the store. I did not make any messes. I did not pick any fights. I did not shoplift. I was a champion wire fox terrier, answering questions from people about my breed, passing out my cards and getting lots of pets.

At the end, muzzer said I had some monies left on my card. She said maybe I should use it on toys, one for me and one for Teka, and she would pay any extra money we needed from my wages at the store.

I thought that was OK, and we spent nearly half an hour in the toy aisle, checking things out and testing them. In the end though, we knew we would get a couple of different Cuz toys, cause they are the only ones that do not meet a quick and nasty end.

So I got a red good cuz, medium size for Teka, and a big Orange Dino cuz for me. And we went and checked out, and we used all my gift monies and some of muzzer's monies. We put all our goodies in the trunk and headed for home!


Teka met us at the door to the garage.

She said "Like, what did you get me? And it better be pink!" and "Give it to me now or I'll bite your ear off."

And "C'mon, c'mon...what is taking so long?"

So muzzer put the bag down and took off my leash, and then she took the two cuz toys over to the counter to cut off their tags.

Teka was very impatient. She yipped and barked.

Muzzer cut the tag off Teka's red cuz first.

Teka took it across the room and dropped it.

Then muzzer gave me my orange cuz. Before I had my teeth around it, Teka grabbed it by the tiny orange tail and took off. Out the dog door. Around the back yard. In the dog door. Through Dad's study, through the living room, down the hallway, through the bedroom, onto the big bed, off of the big bed and under the big bed. Out the door to muzzer's office, through the dining room, into the kitchen, out the dog door. Whew. Finally she took the orange cuz under the lysaloma bush and proceeded to kill it.

Here are the results of her labors.

It took her less than one hour to accomplish this.

We have only found one of the orange chunks so far.

Muzzer hopes there will be more around the house.

Otherwise, Teka is gonna be one interesting study in poop.

She will be pooping orange chunks and bits for some time I think.

See the bottom of the poor cuz?

I am planning to give him a burial with full honors, even though he was not with us very long.

I have taken the red cuz and hidden it in my favorite place.
It is in the shoe cubbies in muzzer's closed, behind her
black and white houndstooth flats.

Please do not tell Teka. She will just murder another one.

One unhappy terrier
gussie

22 comments:

Peanut said...

That teka how could she kill your cuz? You were right to hide the red one from her.

Patience-please said...

OHHHH Gussie! We love the venison and rice too! Did you ever try the herring and potato? We LOVE it, but the servant wrinkles her mostly useless nose and says it smells like anal glands. Like that's a bad thing???

Bet Teka will have some psycho dellic poops!

wags from the whippet waggle

Stanley said...

Gussie!

Your post is SO serendipitous! Stella did the same exact murder for hire job on her brand new ORANGE DINO CUZ! I will provide photographic proof later.

Maybe we should ship Stella & Teka to the same prison colony on an island far far away!

About those Goober Snacks, I have tried them (I believe somedog gave them to me for a gift), and I LOVED them. They really are gooberlicious (truth in advertising for once).

I am not currently receiving any royalties, but you can bet I will be checking into it.

Goober love & sympathetic smooches,
Stanley

Stanley said...

Pee Ess,

There is this one stuff my buddies use on their white & caramel colored cocker spaniel that makes her white white WHITE!

I'll get the name & peemail you.

Goob love,
Stanley

Harry said...

Oh my! Maybe I should be gratful for Cassidy's nibbly teeth. Teka is a one woman destroying machine!

Toodle pip,
Harry x

Lenny said...

Wow! How do you kill a Cuz? Because I've sure tried! That's amazing. Don't give her back the red one, Gussie! A good cuz for the good dog.

Your friend, Lenny

Faya said...

Oh Destructor ! Does something resists her ? ....poor Gus....
Kisses, Faya

Molly the Airedale said...

OMG! Has she no manners at all?! How ungrateful she is! We won't breathe a word about where you hid the red Cuz, Gussie! Teka doesn't deserve it! Poor Dino Cuz!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Gus...for some reason after reading your story, Mumsie is wiping her eyes. She must be upset for you...oops...actually she's laughing!!! She said she didn't know it was possible to kill a cuz...at least we haven't...

Better keep Teka away from muzzer's shoeies...Babystan steals our souls...er soles...and eats them

Hey...poker at our place tonight...and pups are ready for adoption...

Scruffy

Buster the Wired Fox Terror said...

Oh Dog Gus! Maybe she is in a different dimension where time is speeded up or something?

Bussie Kissies
Buster

Asta said...

Gussie
I'm appaled at Teka's bahaviow!! You have all my sympafies and I hope she nevew finds youw hidy place..little bwat!
Iuse pro-line BlueMinx supew concentwated shampoo..it bwightens and conditions and makes you look gweat and smell good too(don't let Teka use any if you get some)

I wish I"d bump into you on my cowner
don't be unhappy, at least you got to go with Muzzew
smoochie kisses
Asta

Jake of Florida said...

We've never had a cuz -- but we think, for truth in advertising, the manufacturers should put a photo of Teka on it to warn future purchasers.

Well at least you have yours safely hidden.

And some yummy treats. We'll have to check them out, as soon as we finish the schmackos you sent us.

Jake and Just Harry

Gus, Louie and Callie said...

That is exactly what Louie and would have done with that orange thing. She always tries to find blue heeler proof toys. It is pretty difficult since we like to fight over the same toy and we like to shake them so stuffed toys are out for sure...

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus and Louie

Eddie N Peaches said...

An outing to the doggie stuff store is a fun time! So glad you got to go..
Whoofs & Baroos,
Eddie, Peaches, Bella & Lady

Joe Stains said...

Omdog I could NOT look. I mean, a CUZ?! Murdering a CUZ?! I don't know if I can even put into words the sadness I feel. Sadness for you, Gus, and for the poor CUZ. I am going to my sleeping bag.

Koobuss said...

Sounds like your happy shopping trip ended in disaster. You were such a gentleman Gus, so well behaved, and then look what happened when you got home. At least Teka is entertaining! And it was so nice of you to be generous the way you were and get her a toy with your own money.

I'm glad you hid the red cuz. She doesn't have to know that one was meant for her. I guess she doesn't like red. That may be a good thing. Get more red stuff.

Love and Koobuss Kisses,
Koobie

wally said...

Ho-ly cow. That dog ain't right!

But venison and brown rice sounds good. It would definitely soothe my sadness.

wally

Katie said...

I hide things all the time from Sam and Zorra. They are always trying to kill my toys. But, I like to kill theirs!!

I hope Muzzer has better luck with that whitening shampoo that our Mom did on Sam. She sort of bleached his fur. BOL. Because... mostly he is a dirty pig and needs at least 3 sudsing most of the time.

Ashley said...

Max loves going to the pet store for fun stuff too!

Max just won a contest and will be featured in an upcoming calendar!

We will be doing a drawing for FREE calendars. Just post a comment on our blog if you would like to be entered in the contest!

Happy New Year!

Agatha and Archie said...

OK listen,don't kill us,but ya really gotta admire a woman THAT CAN KILL A CUZ!!!! Agatha(the QUEEN of stuffy kills) has not yet managed that.....However,it is despicable that she took yours esp after you were so sweet to treat her.Sound slike a lovely shopping trip.Archie says to tell you you can shop and never even have to leave your crate....details if you want them..Love A+A

Jackson's J1 and J2 said...

Hey Gus, we don't have cuz toys over here yet. I'm sure that it wouldn't last long though. Teka is a girl after my own heart! J x

The Brat Pack said...

We love going to the store to get new stuff too...that totally stinks about your cuz. Good thing you hid the other one.

Tucker-Doodle