28 September 2006

Thank you

Whew! I never knew there were so many people out there who care about my tummy! Thanks to everyone (except E.Rabbit, who insulted my new scarf) for their tips and concern. I had my first real (dog food) meal tonight after almost 48 hours of rice-and. Boy, did it taste great. I gobbled my ration down right away, and followed the advice to drink lots of water too.

I am feeling much better. Do not tell the humans though. I am still acting a little less energetic in hopes that muzzer will try the rice-and chicken that was recommended. I like chicken! Even if it does come with rice-and.


27 September 2006

A Mysterious Ailment

I, Gussie, have had a mysterious ailment for the past two days. It has rendered me unpleasant to be around (strictly in an olfactory sense, you understand.) It has made my tummy uncomfortable, so that I moan in my sleep. It has forced me to get up in the early hours of the morning and ..... In the living room, which is as far from the big bed as I can get. It has made it difficult, dear readers, to maintain my usual blogging brilliance, because I am unable to sit upright to type.

For two days I have not eaten my dog food! Teka came over last night and ate it for me, which was kind of her and greatly appreciated. I have been searching my brain for the possible cause of this ailment, and have made muzzer frantically search the veterinary sites for information.

We have come up with three possible suspects.

1. The new dog food in the bowl in the kitchen. On Sunday muzzer bought a different brand of dog food. She read on the terrier hotline that Beneful, which I love, is perhaps not the most enlightened and nourishing food for the active terrier. So, she got me this stuff in the red bag, and has mixed it with my old favorite. I think it tasted OK, but maybe it is too rich for my delicate stomach. I remember having this brand in Virginia, but think it came in an Orange bag. Perhaps I am allergic to dog food which is packaged in red. Mmm. Probably not. I think I am supposed to be color blind anyway.

2. This new and unusual toy that muzzer brought home is a suspicious character. It is one of the weirdest she has ever come up with. She says it is called a Bullwinkle, and it is usually accompanied by a "Rocky." Do you think that in my eagerness to tear into this toy I may have eaten the "Rocky" instead. I don't remember it, but I know that I am not supposed to eat rocks or gravel. Mmmm. It may be a possibility. Or perhaps I am sensitive to Bullwinkles. Anyway, I have abandoned it on the living room floor, and am once again terrorizing Elmo. I have unzipped his velcro more times than I can count, and he still manages to put himself back together.

3. Muzzer thinks that perhaps I ate something bad in the back yard. She has found many pecan shells scattered in the living room and in Dad's office recently. I do think they are delicious, and I must confess that I do not always discriminate carefully between the pecans (which are yummy) and the shells (which are probably as bad for me a gravel, almost.) Dad tends to discount this theory, since their previous dogs did not have any problems with the extra dietary fiber. But hey, Terriers are much more sensitive than Springer Spaniels, so I cannot dismiss this out of hand.

Anyway, I have been getting really hungry, despite the fact that I've not wanted to eat my dry food. So, this morning, muzzer took pity on me. She cooked some white rice, and when it had cooled, she mashed it up with a banana and put it in a people bowl next to my food bowl. Well, I thought that was pretty good, as you can see from the photo on the left. She kept some of the rice, and we took it to the store today for lunch, then when we came home at dinner time, she mashed up a little poached salmon in another bowl of rice. I am thinking this is pretty good stuff. She says I can have it for another twenty four hours, and then we will see how I am doing. Tomorrow I can have some applesauce in it for breakfast. I am waiting eagerly to see what treat she comes up with for lunch and dinner. Did I mention she is a pretty good cook? Wonder if she has any of that marinara sauce stuff left. Or maybe there are some leftover carnitas with green chile sauce. Probably not, huh? Oh well, we will just have to wait and see. Meanwhile, I am practicing looking pitiful and wistful to see if I can stretch this diet out a bit longer.

By the way, she feels so sorry for me that she is typing this at my dictation so I don't have to struggle with the keyboard. So I will apologize for any spelling errors she has made, and hope that you will bear with me during my recovery.

Your Pal

23 September 2006

in honor of punctuation

today or tomorrow by some accounts is national punctuation day honoring the role that punctuation plays in our lives as an author and poet i respect punctuation without all those periods semicolons commas and quotation marks where would i be right out here with eecummings and the rest of his ilk i suppose to say nothing of the major use of parentheses and colons not the interior plumbing kind but the kind that lets you know who owns what and makes room for contractions which i cannot use here because i am not using punctuation in case you have not figured it out by now and thought i was pretending to be james joyce or someone like that who writes long sentences and yawn this is exhausting but it is somewhat easier because i do not need to use the shift key or even the space bar much which raises an interesting question which is is the space between words punctuation i will leave that question to my academic family and friends go ahead and post your answer but do not copy my melodious and mellifulous flowing style thank you for your help and concern your pal gussie who is till nekkid

19 September 2006

I Am Nekkid!

Well the visit to the new groomer was a real snafu. A regular pollywog. A mess. A travesty. A joke.

And the end result. People, I am nekkid. I am clipped down to nothing with pink skin showing through my fluff! I am unhappy. I am embarrassed. I am reduced to wearing my sweater in Arizona in September.

Muzzer is in the doghouse! She is sleeping on the floor tonight! She arranged this and she shall pay!

Sheesh. I don't care if it was a good cause that she bought this gift certificate from. It did not have a Positive Impact on my self image.

And she expects me to go to the store with her! Everyone is going to laugh. I am mortified.

But I am scoring pretty heavily in the treat department, and even guilted her out of a couple of scallops for dinner!

I may grow out by Christmas. But when Travis comes next week, he is going to roll on the floor laughing, and I am going to have to beat him up!

And to make it all worse, they put a little blue bow on me! Go ahead, laugh. Get it over with now.



I just found out that I am going to see a new groomer today! I thought I could keep muzzer from making an appointment by chewing on my feet every once in a while, but it seems that with all the grief counseling for sqrll and other activities I have forgotten to chomp for almost two weeks!

So, now it is off to the "new" groomer and I am not a happy boy! Reports later.

16 September 2006

tagged again!

My friend Ivy has tagged me in the new game. This one says that you have to tell five things that make dog friends special. Everyone is confused about whether this is supposed to be human friends of dogs or dog friends of dogs or dog friends of humans. I don't know either, so I am doing this "My Way" just like Frank Sinatra.

1. Friends make you special sweaters .........

and then they take you for walks to show them off.

2. Friends are good to nap with,
particularly when the floor is cold.

3. Friends come over to play in your yard, they steal your toys, they eat your bones, they chew on your ears, and you still love them.

4. Friends take you new places....
they let you sit in the middle so you can get the breeze from the air conditioner, and they save you treats from dinner in a doggy bag.

5. Friends get together after a long time apart.......
and still like one another.
They may not look like they did the last time you saw them
but they still are your friends.

I tag Axel, Louis the Pug, Fee, Mackie, and Teka! hehehe

15 September 2006

Muzzer is upset

OOOH! I wouldn't want to be with the AZ Diamondbacks management team today. They have made muzzer mad! They have made her very mad! She is planning her revenge, and I, Gussie, know that is awesome for mere mortals to contemplate.

Why is she mad? Muzzer is NOT a baseball fanatic. Muzzer is not even a baseball fan. But as Dad explained it to me last night, sometimes she sort of "adopts" a player so she has something to think about when she goes to baseball games with him. And for the past year, her "adoptee" has been Luis Gonzalez, who plays for the Diamondbacks. Oh, yeah. Except when the Diamondbacks play the St. Louis Cardinals, where she has also "adopted" Albert P. Then she just sits in her seat and hopes that neither of her kids gets hurt on the field.

Anyway... She is mad because the Diamondbacks announced last night that they would not be letting Luis G on the team next year. They are "releasing" him. Muzzer says that is a nice way to say that they do not appreciate what he has done for the team, that they have no respect for his contributions to the community, and that they are a bunch of soul-less bastards.

She told Dad last night that she will not go to Diamondback games with him anymore. This morning, she has given that some additional thought, and she says that she will go to games, but she plans to dress in black (her little Italian Grandmother outfit) wear a black scarf on her hair, carry a large crucifix and a sign that says she is praying for their souls. (don't ask me how they can have souls to pray for and still be soul-less bastards, I'm just a terrier) Dad says she needs to calm down before she does something silly and sacrilegious. Now she is mad at Dad too.

I am laying low and not saying anything for a while, and I am putting a picture of Mr. Gonzalez in the blog today to honor her right to her opinions.


13 September 2006

Requiem for Squirrel

"Dies Ire, dies illa, solvet seclum in favilla" *

My friend sqrll died today
He's buried in the ground
And muzzer had the pipers come
While we all gathered 'round.

They played that song, " Amazing Grace "
And everyone did cry
Poor sqrll is in a better place
The rainbow bridge on high.


*From the Tridentine Latin Mass for the Dead

10 September 2006

A New Friend for Gussie!

Muzzer and E.Beth went garage sailing today. I am still not sure how you make a garage sail, but .... it probably has something to do with shopping.

My friend Teka got a pink pig. It is soft and cuddly. Muzzer got me this bright orange thing with a big black nose. His name is Elmo! He is OK, except his middle part is very hard and when I bite him, he talks to me! Muzzer and Dad and E.Beth laughed and laughed. They think it is funny when I start to chew on him and he talks to me! I don't think it is funny at all.

I mean, how can I concentrate on tearing him to pieces when he says things like "Hugs and Kisses!" and "Elmo Loves You" and "Will you be Elmo's sweetheart?" Sheesh.

I have discovered that there is a seam in his butt. I am going to investigate it later when everyone is asleep in the big bed. If I can get Elmo to shut up for a while, anyway. But I think he will probably squawk and wake everybody up. Then I will be in trouble.

I do not think this is a dignified type of toy for a terrier. I think I will mount a protest. I will have to think and think some more. I will let you know what I decide.

your pal

09 September 2006


To those who think my poems lame
And not deserving of the name

A waste of time, a turn of phrase
That illustrates my doggy ways

My friends, you must remember well
That's why this is called doggerel


07 September 2006

Dedicated to sqrll....

Who takes a lickin'
But keeps on squickin:

Oh stalwart sqrll between my paws
Also happy between my jaws
My life without you was so damn drear
I'm really, really glad you're here.

Yr squeaker makes a happy noise
Yr furry head brings lots of joys
And when I chew yr furry tail
Other toys beside you pale

I know you cannot last for ever
But you are cute, and oh so clever
That you and I can bond together
And share our lives with one another

I'm glad I found you in that box
Nestled in among dad's socks
And when yr squeaking time is done
I'll bury you out in the sun


06 September 2006

sqrll, day 3

Here I am again with an update on sqrll. My life is really not that unexciting, but sqrll has become an issue, and is developing his own fan club.

When Travis came to visit on Monday I hid sqrll under the bed. It was a good thing too, because together, Travis and I killed a rabbit (stuffed) and a frisbee (floppy) in addition to treats and frosty paws! Yummm! Life is going to be interesting when Travis comes. He is one fast puppy! I think because his legs are so much longer. I kept up just fine though....and even got ahead of him by running between his legs and shooting out in front! Good thing for my sake he didn't try to sit down right about then, huh?

Anyway, by the time the folks sat down at the table for ribs and corn on the cob, Travis and I were pretty worn out, so we took a break and just spent some quality time begging for scraps and more frosty paws treats. Begging is hard work, but Travis and I are both naturals, so it takes less effort than you might think to look cute and deserving. I like the "cock the head slightly to one side, put one ear up and one down, and let your tongue hang out just a little" while Travis favors the "collapse full length on the floor, put your head on your front paws and sigh deeply" approach. Travis stretched full length on the floor is really awe inspiring! Anyway, whatever works for you, huh?

Then yesterday muzzer brought home the prize that she bid on for me at the scrub ball! She got me a whole big gym bag thing full of treats and prizes. And she opened it up, put it on the floor and let me pick! I grabbed a stuffed ball kind of like the one that E.Rabbit got me for Christmas! It squeaked! It took me about 17 seconds to tear into that ball thingy, grab the squeaker and run off with it. Dad thought it was funny, and even played with me for a while.

Squeaker games are loud! Dad grabs it and squeaks it a few times, then I grab it back, and we just keep that up. I guess that was why muzzer came in and made us give her the squeaker. She couldn't stand the noise! Dad was holding it when she came into his office, so HE got into trouble for not taking away from me right away. hehehe! Sheesh! Does she really think I am stupid enough to swallow that thing? Anyway. That is the short but happy tale of ball and squeak, may they both rest in peace. (Hmm, that sounds like a good name for an English pub....The Ball and Squeak. Oh well, someone has probably already used it)

I've gotta go now. Today is Wednesday, and I have to pack my bag to go to work with muzzer. My friend Barb H. sent word to bring some more treats because my stock at the store is almost gone! Wouldn't want to run out ... gotta keep up my strength.

04 September 2006

Sqrll - Day 2!

Sqrll is still squeaking!

03 September 2006

Hey Ivy! I haf captured a sqwerrel!

Look Ivy! I got a squirrel this morning. It was quite an adventure. Muzzer was unpacking boxes from our apartment in Virginia, and she took a whole bunch of stuff out of one box into the kitchen to put away in the cabinets there.

I stealthily crept (creeped?) into the extra bedroom to investigate the box, which still smelled like home in Virginia. In there, buried deep beneath layers of newspaper from DeeSee and Roanoke, I found this critter.

I knew immediately that it was a varmint, because it was tied to a stiff board with three pieces of string. Regardless, I was determined to liberate it and take it somewhere safe to examine it more carefully. It took merely seconds, because when muzzer came back toward the box room, I was headed out to the office with the newly freed squirrel in my mouth!

TahDa. The first photo is of my and my captive under the computer desk. Aah. Victory.

Then you see muzzer's hand holding MY squirrel, to show you his new Mohawk hairdo I gave him. I think it is a distinct improvement, don't you?

I am having much fun with my squirrel. He still squeaks, and I have had him for almost an hour. Such strength in so small a varmint is truly to be admired. We have played in the family room with Dad as he watches television. Dad's favorite new game is called "Rocky, the flying squirrel." Sqrrl and I don't like that one, since it requires me to let Dad take Sqrrl out of my mouth and throw him.

So Sqrrl and I moved into the office again with muzzer. She is a much quieter person to be with than Dad. Sqrrl and I are taking a nap together, but I am not letting him get too far away! I think this squirrel could get into a lot of trouble on his own. I think that is why muzzer had him locked up in the box from Virginia. I am accepting responsibility for this squirrel and his antics, and I will work with him until he stops squeaking and has no hair left on his squirrelly head. I think he will look much better then, and be less threatening to Teka when she comes to visit.

Until then, I will just stay close to him and try to figure out the mysteries of the squirrel. Such as: Who tied him to that board? What did he eat in that box while we were in New Mexico and he was living in the box room? Did he leave friends in Virginia like I did? Does he miss them too? Maybe having a squirrel from Virginia for a friend will not be so bad. He does sort of drawl when he talks, and it sounds kind of cute.

Well, Sqrrl and I are off on our adventures. Tomorrow my friend Travis is coming for dinner, and if he is very good I will let him play with Sqrrl too. More about that later.

slurpy kisses with squirrel fur from
your pal, Gussie